When my son finished high school the question of what he was going to do with his life was the utmost question on his mother and my mind. It simply wasn’t something he had talked much about. We always knew that whatever he chose to do, he would do well at it; but what exactly that was, remained quite the mystery. So, when he mentioned plans of enrolling into the E.M.T. program at one of the local colleges we were happy for him.

It seemed like a good fit. He had always been quick witted and has had a desire to help people. Physically fit and lacking fear. A very strong willed young man, with a desire to succeed. We were determined to help him in any way we could. His mother did the necessary research and got him enrolled into the classes he needed to take. I got him everything he needed for class. He started his classes in the Fall of the year he graduated high school, and truthfully, I didn’t think any more about it.

By the end of his second semester I could tell something was up. My son was simply not the same. His attitude had changed. Seemed angry, depressed, not engaging at all. Any time I questioned him about his schooling he said he was “fine”. Things simply seemed off. That didn’t set well with me. But, I figured, he’s a man now, his business was his own. So I left him be. The third semester came and his attitude hadn’t improved. Now my willingness to allow him to find his own footing had diminished. I decided to press him until I had a legitimate answer. So, I asked him to go for a drive.

The drive started simple enough. Same as always. Idle talk. Music. Then we came to a parking lot and I pulled in. Put the car in park and I turned to him. Said, I wanted to know what was up. His response was same as usual. Things are fine, no worries, etc. I called bullshit. Told him we weren’t leaving until I heard the truth. His face changed. I noticed tears well up in his eyes. I told him it was “ok”, he could tell me. What he said to me that night, hit me hard. I was unprepared for it. Never once during the prior years of working did I ever consider what he told me. It just never had crossed my mind.

See, I had a business that I had ran for 15 years. Fifteen years while I was married to his mother. We had started it together and ended it together. From the time he was a baby, he had been following me around in that business. Doing various tasks that his age allowed him as he was permitted. He was quite the “helper”. Then the pressures of business took its toll, his mom and I got divorced, and we sold that business. It had never occurred to me that he had always thought he would be working with me in that business. I simply didn’t know.

So here I am sitting in my car, with my son spilling his guts, about how he thought things would be; and how they weren’t, how they never could be. How my career change didn’t have a place for him. How I had told him in order to be a part of what I was doing now, he needed to be older. It was something I didn’t even remember saying to him. But he had remembered it. Vividly. He told me he only picked the EMT program because he was feeling pressure to pick something; and after we had sold the business, he didn’t know what to do. How he didn’t really care what he was doing as long as it was with me. Gotta say…at that moment, I’ve never felt less of a father. I had always been one to be “in tune” with my kids. But I had missed it. I never once realized my sons desire was to be working with his dad. Not once.

I wanted him to plot his own course, ya know? Create his own destiny. I didn’t want him to be forced into something I wanted him to be; I wanted him to choose on his own. And truthfully…I wanted him to avoid the mistakes of his father. I thought by him making his own way, I guess I could avoid the responsibility of his potential failure.

But my son…MY son, sitting there, the look on his face; I’ll never forget it.

He NEEDED his father.

I told him to drop out of the program. He asked about the student loans. I told him not to worry about them. I told him if he was serious about working with me that he could start the next day. Told him it would take a bit of effort, but that we’d deal. Told him he WAS too young, that he would be eating an elephant, but as long as he was willing to learn and listen, we could manage it. From a logical standpoint, it was a crazy proposition. But I didn’t care much. We were doing this.

I hesitated taking him on his first sit. It wasn’t a sit I would have chosen to break him in on. But, it was all I had at the time and he was coming along. It was a large account and this was a tough client. I didn’t have the time to coach him proper. The decision had been made and we simply went with it.

Literally, a dozen of things could have gone wrong that day. But they didn’t. It was smooth. Smooth as butter. And David? That kid was a natural. Total ice. Afterwards, in the car, I told him I had taken numerous “newbies” on sits less important and they’ve jacked it up; but not him, he was solid. That impressed me. Ya, he’s my son, but if he didn’t have the juice, he knows I wouldn’t hesitate to tell him so. But that day, that kid did it right. With no training.

It’s been two years since he’s been working with me. Sure, there have been days we’ve cracked heads. But I gotta say, I don’t regret my decision that night to bring him with me. It’s been a kick in the pants. This kid…this kid has the potential of being great. And as his father, that makes me proud.

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