When I started this project, I was looking for something to delve into that would help me collect my thoughts. However, as things progressed, I found myself more and more lost in a world of memory, remorse, anticipation, and hope. The Enneagram has a way of doing that, I guess. It exposes the pain in life. Hard to study the Enneagram and not recognize how you could have done things in the past differently.

Shortly after posting the first few blogs I was asked, “Why have you focused on the negative aspects of each type?”. My response: “Because THAT is the Enneagram”.

The Enneagram isn’t designed to give you a “warm and fuzzy” feeling inside. It’s designed to “gut” you. Expose you. Shine a light on all your faults. Expose your weaknesses. Give you the opportunity to recognize the things in your behavior that are holding you back and preventing you from truly connecting with people in your life. It sucks. It hurts. It takes work. But to truly live a life that Christ intended you to live, you have to recognize that change is required and worth it. Transformation. Christ is all for it. Christ died to CHANGE you. Change your outcome. Free you. That’s the price that was paid through pain, suffering, and the Cross. Salvation came AFTER the brutal pain and suffering of the Cross. Remember that. People want to skip the pain and suffering of the Cross and go right to the Resurrection. It doesn’t work that way.

The Enneagram is simply a tool that will assist you in confronting that pain. In fact, Richard Rohr and Andreas Ebert, in their book, “The Enneagram, a Christian Perspective”, describe the enneagram like this: “The enneagram is not mathematics. It is the art of reading and transforming the soul into godly truth.” “Only suffering and prayer are strong enough to decentralize both the ego and the superego. The practice of prayer we can choose to do ourselves; the suffering is done to us.” “The Enneagram is just such a thing. It leads to both interior suffering and desperate prayer when we realize we cannot convert or transform ourselves.” “The Enneagram does not disguise pain, the major surgery, or the price of enlightenment”.

So you see, this isn’t for the timid. To truly dig deep into who you are, why you do what you do, how you came to be, requires bravery. It’s no small task. But THIS is what Christ requires of you. Requires of all who truly seek Him. You can’t fake your way to Salvation. You can’t ride someone else’s belief to Salvation. You must receive it on your own. On your own journey, to the Cross.

I get it. No one likes to look into a mirror. I know I don’t. It’s unpleasant. So we spend our days, exchanging with other people, passing by each other on this stage of life, bumping shoulders occasionally, stumbling along in relationships, blind to who we are. Unaware of who the people around us are. How we interact and connect. For what? For what purpose. Aimlessly making claims, accusations, assumptions, and placing labels founded on nothing. How foolish is that? How insane is that.

What if…..what if there was a way, to shorten or bridge the learning curve? Come to an understanding sooner. Quicker. Be more efficient in our interactions. I believe the Enneagram does that. Through change. Personal growth. Everyone is quick to point the finger, I know. Much easier to point across the table. I get it. No one likes to take responsibility for the shit they bring to the table. But that doesn’t cut to the core of things very fast, now does it? Doesn’t tackle all the tough things that everyone needs to know about themselves but are too afraid to talk about. Our side of the coin; is our own responsibility.

No one has any desire to repeat history or live in the past. I know I don’t. But perhaps, with a bit of study and prayer, just maybe, we can capture what has been afforded us; recognize it when it’s present, and finally experience what God intended. By being tenacious. Intent with the pursuit and purpose to allow Christ to change our heart. Become the student willing to submit to the Teacher. Humble ourselves and take responsibility.

Perhaps in some way, determining your Type will set you free. Give you solace of who you are. Help you realize there’s nothing “wrong” with you. Every Enneagram type has positive and negative traits that will enhance or destroy a relationship. None are “better” or “worse” than the others. Hopefully understanding this will allow you to realize the things you can improve on. Allow you to be at peace with the things about you, that you have struggled with; accept who you are. I know for me, it has.

Then, maybe…just maybe, the dreams in life that we all reach for, won’t slip so fast, so far out of reach, so soon.

And with that….it’s done. Ephesians 4:22-25.

 

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